Learning how to give your lady an intense, connecting and eye-rolling erotic massage could be one of the most rewarding investments of your time to learn.

To set yourself up for success, there are certain things that should be done before, during and after to make it an unforgettable experience for you both.

This article will give you the basics to set up then follow through on giving your lady a brilliant experience she will remember and ask for again.

Most important for maximum enjoyment and pleasure is having your lady in the right mindset. Specifically, having her 100% present in the moment. No thoughts of work, kids, or anything else that takes up our days. She needs to be completely relaxed, open to you and ready to enjoy every single moment of what’s about to happen. This can be done by guiding her mind in the right direction.

Build anticipation before you begin the massage

If you’re giving her a massage later that day, send her a text a few hours before hinting at what’s going to happen at that time. A bit of curiosity builds anticipation in a very good way. Give her something to contemplate for the rest of her day while NOT giving her all the details.

Done right, the anticipation will lead to her feeling aroused, present, open and ready to enjoy.

Have your prep work done well in advance

Little things can make a big difference. Make sure your nails are trimmed with no rough spots. If you work with your hands and they’re a little dry and rough, do your to soften them up with some hydrating lotion. Your lover will appreciate it!

Before you begin make sure your hands are warmed up. Cold hands can ruin the mood rather quickly.

Have your massage oil of choice ready to go. My two personal favorites are coconut oil or grapeseed oil. Both are good for the skin and safe for external or internal use. With grapeseed oil specifically, warm it slightly in your hands before applying to avoid a cold shock. However,

once you’re into the massage and her skin in warm and alive, pouring a bit of cool oil onto her skin can be highly arousing.

Setting the mood

Have your lady take a hot shower or bath before you begin. Being warm helps her to relax into what’s to follow.

One of the ways to enhance the intimate atmosphere before giving your lady an erotic massage is getting the lighting correct. Either dim or shut of off any bright lighting then use strategically placed candles to create a more intimate atmosphere. Scented candles add a nice aroma. A hot massage candle is also great for playing with wax! It can also increase arousal when dripped onto her back, nipples, thighs etc. Why not make your lover wiggle in a very good way.

How to give an erotic massage

Ok. You have your lady present and ready to begin. Here’s how to give an erotic massage she’ll crave over and over.

Have her lie face down and begin by applying a generous amount of oil to your hands then to her upper back. Pay attention to the pressure of your hands. Getting this right is important and your best guide is her reaction to what you’re doing. Strong hands are needed here. You don’t want to cause discomfort but this is to be a deep-tissue massage and we want to stimulate her. You can alternate with an occasional lighter touch (i.e. finger tips only) to switch things up for a brief moment but mostly, we want firm pressure.

If you’ve ever shaken hands with someone who has a soft grip like squeezing a dead trout you know what I mean about a bit of firm pressure. Nothing sexy about weak hands!

Alternating between your fingers, thumbs and palms of your hands, apply good pressure to her , neck and back. Lots of oils should be used to maximize her pleasure.

(Important point at this moment: TAKE YOUR TIME! Start slowly and build into it.)

You can do this from the side but my preference is to sit lightly on her thighs to give the best angle for reaching every muscle.

Using your thumbs and good pressure, trace up the outside on both sides of her spin from lower back to her neck and back down.

Use your thumbs to apply good pressure to the muscle of her . These are often tight and can be sensitive but also, can provide incredible pleasure when done well. Again, pay close attention to how she’s reacting to your touch. You should already be hearing good things from your lady. Learning how to give an erotic massage is a combination of guiding her mind to keep her in the moment,  the technique and pressure you apply with your hands and knowing intuitively when it’s time to change up the routine for maximum pleasure.

Arms and hands

After spending a good amount of time on her back and neck, move to her arms and hands. These often get overlooked for a massage, but they have sensitive spots that can enhance her pleasure. Focus on her upper arms, fingers and the palms of her hands using as much pressure as she’s comfortable with.

Calves and feet

It’s now time to move down to her butt, thighs, calves, and feet. Personally, I skip her butt and thighs for a bit. I want to build anticipation so I pretend those areas don’t exist and move on down. Starting at the back of her knees I use firm pressure to massage her calves. These can also be sensitive on some ladies so she how she reacts to your touch. If she’s comfortable, using your thumbs for extra pressure can work well here.

Next are the feet and toes. Not an area to spend too much time on but, like the hands, they deserve some attention. Using lot of oil, massage around the ankle taking in the soles and toes. For some ladies this can be either amazing or an unpleasant experience, so some experimenting is required.

By now, your lady should be in a very relaxed, but heightened place of attention. She will likely be quite vocal in her pleasurable state but, now it’s time to take her to an even happier place.

Thighs and beyond

Let’s give her thighs the attention they deserve.

Always with well-oiled hands, and starting at the back of her knees, use your palm and fingers to firmly massage up to her butt cheeks and back down. Repeat this several times to get blood flowing to her skin and to further build her anticipation.

Now switch to using your thumbs only, do the same move but with greater pressure. After a few minutes of this go ahead and spread her legs just enough to allow access to her inner thighs. Move to her side and using fingers and the well-oiled palms of your hands, starting just above the back of her left knee, reach over her thigh and down then pull back towards you using firm pressure. Alternate your hands while slowly in a rolling motion moving up towards her butt. At the top of her thigh, come as close as you can to her vagina without actually touching it. Now repeat on the right thigh. This generally creates an extremely positive reaction. Take your time and enjoy yourself!

Now it’s time to give her lovely ass some attention. Again, I will come close to her vagina but now actually touch it just yet. My preference is to massage her butt while sitting back on her thighs but see what feels best for you. Use both hands to pressure her cheeks and don’t be too gentle. This area can take some firm pressure.

What’s next?

Congratulations. By learning the basics of how to give an erotic massage, you’ve taken a huge step towards connecting with your lady in an intense and meaningful way. By now your lady should be literally putty in your hands. There are two ways to go from her. You can ask her to flip over onto her back to continue the massage or you can start to please her vagina with your fingers, a toy, or a combination of both.

I will go into specifics of the fingering to drive your lady crazy in a future post but regardless of whether you please her while she’s on her front or turn her over and massage her legs, stomach, breasts, and from the front and then use your fingers to bring her to the first of many powerful orgasms, your lady by now will be in a very, very happy place.

(Since I share information on men’s health issues with awesome people like you, naturally my content may contain affiliate links for products I either use and love or am otherwise familiar with. If you take action (i.e. subscribe, make a purchase) after clicking one of these links, I’ll earn some coffee money ☕️ which I promise to drink while creating more helpful content like this. Cheers!)

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